I had them bad.
And no one even warned me about them.
70-80% of women experience them.
I just wanna jot down a few emotions I felt so that other mommies out there, or mommies to be, won't feel like the Creature from the Black Lagoon when they experience them.
I was mad at myself for getting pregnant.
I resented feeding my child because it was painful.
I became mournful of the "just the two of us lifestyle."
I got mad at myself because I didn't know what to do.
I once told my baby to "shut up."
I did have the urge to shake my child out of frustration.
(Don't worry, I laid her down and walked out of the room)
I became angry when other people wanted to hold my baby.
I cried for no reason.
I cried because all I wanted to do was sleep.
I became saddened when I compared myself to other moms.
I did not enjoy my baby.
This last one is a doozy, and unless you've experienced it, you will think I'm a terrible person. I did not fall in love with my child immediately. I chalk this up wholly to my birth experience. I knew I gave birth to a child, I even got to see this little bundle, but I did not get to spend (much) time with her while in the hospital. It took me about 4 weeks to truly say "I love this baby." I cried when dressing her once because I found a onesie that said "Mommy Loves Me." I could not bring myself to put it on her, because I didn't know if it was true or not. So many people told me to get ready to experience love like never before. Well I felt guilty because I didn't. I had to grow into it. Now, I kinda believe that I did indeed love her, I just hadn't felt it yet. But, this emotion is real.
Baby blues and Post Partum Depression are no joke.
Talk to someone daily.. multiple times daily.
I am a firm believer that my baby blues didn't turn into depression simply because I talked it out with my husband constantly. He encouraged me, and supported me. He constantly told me that what I was feeling was normal, and ok. He loved on me and told me that I was a good mom. It's so important to be open and real about your post partum emotions!
Ten ways to help with baby blues:
SLEEP
most important thing - ever
EAT HEALTHY
it will make you feel much better
BE MOBILE ASAP
get up and move around, even do a little stretch/yoga
OPEN WINDOWS
sunshine is happy :)
sunshine is happy :)
STEP OUTSIDE ALONE
I did this several times. The warm sun feels good, and fresh air is nice
ACCEPT HELP
....no seriously. Do it.
TELL DADDY HOW HE CAN HELP
daddy's often need instruction, but are willing to help. encourage him!
LET THE HOUSEWORK GO
...i'm still learning this one.
SHOWER
being clean feels good!
being clean feels good!
PUT ON FRESH MAKEUP
this helps everything!
Did you have the blues? Leave some of your experiences in the comments section so that other mommies reading this can relate to several different experiences!
5 comments:
Thank you for sharing. Lee and I have been talking about issues that are "taboo" that shouldn't be because people need help through them. This is one of them.
I think it is so wonderful that you are talking about it and that you recognized it for what it was and sought help from your hubby. I suffered a little bit of it (not to the same extent) and it was tough. I found myself crying so much that first two weeks and being so frustrated and even a bit resentful too. I knew I loved my baby and I felt it but I also felt such sadness and anger.
Megan, I know exactly what you're talking about. I went through the exact same things you listed, and it was just pure hell. My husband was always supportive and during my pregnancy he read everything he could about what I would go through...baby blues included. Talking to him got me through it. The best thing for me was sleep, good food (I wanted lots of water, pasta, fresh fruit), and showers. OH glorious showers. Amazing. Thanks for sharing this!
I think it is so great that you are posting about this. Most women (myself included) wouldn't have the courage to post about the baby blues. You shouldn't feel bad at all because I thought or felt almost everyone of the things that you listed. I didn't fall in love with my son the second I held him and I felt so awful about it. My problem was not telling anyone bc I felt so guilty. I admire your courage for sharing your experience and I am sure you are a wonderful mother!
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