Isabelle's Birth Story | Part 1

 All photos credit PhotosByMoe
 






No, Isabelle has not been born, but her birth story actually starts a little over four years ago.

I have had so many people ask me "Why?" regarding my plan for natural birth. I have met people who don't understand and have blatantly disagreed with me for choosing the VBAC path. That's ok, people are uncomfortable with what they do not understand. I do not take it personally. Nonetheless, lets get started...

I had planned the most natural, non-invasive birth for my Madison. As things go with birth sometimes, they did not turn out as I had hoped or dreamed. It was quite the opposite, actually. Her full birth story is here if you would like to read it. To summarize, though, I had a very traumatic week before her birth, and the weeks after her birth were less than blissful and full of squishy, warm, first time mommy emotions.

We found out at 39 weeks that Madison was transverse breech. I was convinced that a c section was my only option. I was told my fluid was too low to try a version, that she was too big to turn, and that she needed to come out ASAP. Let me say, I do have peace about her birth now. I do not think that baby was going to turn. She was wedged under my rib so high that she did not even want to come out when the doctors were tugging on her.



I walked away from Madison's birth feeling... weird. Feeling like I was robbed. I did not feel like I had given birth, or even deserved to call our experience birth. I felt like I had failed her (especially since she had complications and was in the NICU). I felt taken advantage of, and I felt as if I needed to mourn - not celebrate.

There is a theory out there that "as long as the baby is healthy" everything is ok. That is so very untrue. NO, I would never put my own desires for birth before my baby's health... But that is not all that matters. A mother's emotional and mental well being matters.

I struggled with Post Partum Depression, I did not bond with Madison, and we had extreme difficulties breastfeeding. I struggled to heal, and had a great deal of anxiety regarding my incision and that healing process.

Fast forward to Harmony's birth. It was much more peaceful, but not exactly a pleasant experience. You see, I had planned a VBAC (vaginal birth after c section) for her. I did have to battle my OB for a few weeks to get his "permission" (eye roll) to try and go into labor, but he eventually agreed. At 20 weeks Harmony was breech. I had an elective ultrasound (meaning I paid for it and the doc didnt order it) at 30 weeks... still breech. I took matters into my own hands and begun doing research. I discovered that chiropractic care can help turn babies into the optimal birthing position. Well, I found an incredible doctor in Prattville, AL who adjusted me weekly and she got her into a good position.

At 40 weeks I had not gone into labor. I had experienced no early signs of labor, and the doctor did not feel that she had engaged in my pelvis preparing for labor. She was really high. He ordered an ultrasound and it was estimated that she weighed nearly 10 pounds. I was advised that my body would not be able to birth a ten pound baby especially not after a c section. Vulnerable and tired, I was easily talked into a repeat cesarean.

Again, the anxiety. Busted blood vessels, nausea on the operating table. The whole nine yards. I did get to hold Harmony within the hour (i think) of her birth. I bonded better with her, I was able to breastfeed her much easier, but even still, I felt incomplete. I felt as if I had missed out. I felt like my body was a failure, and that I did not deserve the mountain top experience that everyone talked about post partum. Oh, and she only weighed 8 pounds.

Here we are finding ourselves pregnant for the third time. I'm immediately scared. I am not excited to bring this baby into this world. My first OB appointment my doctor makes it clear that a vaginal birth is just not in the cards for me. I accepted it. I didn't think my body was capable of it. I was also told I needed to have my tubes tied in order prevent a fourth cesarean since it was so dangerous (Hmmm... if it is so dangerous, then why a third?) I also tried to convince my doctor to perform a natural cesarean where I could watch her birth and and have immediate skin to skin. It's semi new, but it IS being done here in Montgomery. I was immediately shut down by my OB because "that's not protocol."

I had nightmares about c sections (I'll spare you the details). I would scream out in my sleep. I dreamt that someone stole my baby at the hospital because during a c section there is a long period of time that the mother is without her baby. I would cringe at the thought of having another child. I struggled to be excited about our dear sweet baby girl. I was depressed. I suffered from panic attacks, and was overall miserable. I did not want to hear Isabelle's heartbeat. I was mad at her for being in my womb. I was mad at God for making me go through this again, and I hated my body for failing me twice before.

I arbitrarily posted in a local facebook group one day about my experience. I felt as if I was suffering from PTSD (I was) and wanted to connect with other moms who had gone through something similar. Almost immediately a (now) friend took me under her wing. She proclaimed it was possible to have a VBA2C (vaginal birth after two cesareans). She knew because she had achieved it! She recommended her OB, Dr. Jennifer Logan. Dr. Logan is one of two doctors in the Montgomery area who will attend a VBA2C.

I battled with it. I did. I didn't think I could do it. I didn't think it was possible. I didn't think it was safe. I had believed everything that I had been told about VBACS and how supposedly dangerous they are.

I began to educate myself. I dug deeper. I connected with a doula who helped steer me towards legit research. Did you know that a repeat cesarean is actually MORE dangerous than a VBAC? Look it up, I swear! www.vbacfacts.com The more I learned, the more excited I got about our Isabelle. The more I felt God's hand on me and his peace and provision during what would otherwise be a scary time.

So, I made the jump with my supportive hubby by my side. We got ourselves a doula, saw Dr. Logan, and are making preparations for a natural, unmedicated VBA2C. I feel empowered. I feel strong. My body is incredibly capable of birth. My body CAN do this - despite what anyone says. We have educated ourselves (yes, both of us) and have become passionate about natural birth. We practice pain management with our rebozo, and I have been spending time on my exercise ball. I am preparing my mind, body, and soul for the marathon ahead. My husband has been incredible, he is just as excited as I am.

Now, I know just as well as anyone that plans can go awry. And for that, I pray God's hand is upon us and keeps us safe. I know that things can change quickly during birth and my plans may fall through. I know that I will be in a hospital fully capable of an emergency situation. I'm also willing to submit to what is natural and what my body knows to do. I trust the creation because I know the Creator.

Mommy Moments Time!

Hey mamas!
Welcome back for another great week of Mommy Moments Link Ups! Thank you for linking up and for spreading the word last week! We love all of the great posts!

 This week's most viewed link belongs to Becky from My Sweet Moose! Her post Pregnancy Sucks really hit home for me as well as I experienced a similar pregnancy. Often women who struggle through pregnancy feel so alone and guilty for not enjoying the process. I love Becky's honesty and ability to share how rough pregnancy can really be! 


Now it's time to link up your posts! All you have to do is...

1. Follow Host: The Life Of Faith 
2. Link up your post!
Post can include anything related to mommy-hood, children, homemaking, pregnancy etc. If you aren't a mom yet, feel free to link up your preparation for motherhood, your journey as you try to conceive, or even a post that would be encouraging to the other moms in the party!

3. Add the Mommy Moments button to your post or blog so everyone knows where you are linking up!

4. Explore some of the other posts in the link-up and say hello to some new blog friends! 

5. Tweet or Share the link up on Facebook so we can all make even more friends!


The Life Of Faith
<div align="center"><a href="http://the-life-of-faith.blogspot.com//search/label/baby" title="The Life Of Faith"><img src="http://i1114.photobucket.com/albums/k537/faithkonrath/mommymomentsbutton.jpg" alt="The Life Of Faith" style="border:none;" /></a></div>

P.S. We will be having a new guest host every week! Want to be a guest host of the Mommy Moments Blog Hop? Send Faith a message at farmprincess14{at}gmail{dot}com. We would love to have you!

Mommy Moments PARTAY!

Hey mamas!
Welcome back for another great week of Mommy Moments Link Ups! Thank you for linking up and for spreading the word last week! We love all of the great posts!

 This week's most viewed link belongs to Dara from Not In Jersey!  Her post Why I Can't Hear Your Birth Story touched a lot of the mamas who read it as Dara put into words what a lot of moms feel/felt about their birth stories. 
DSC02624

Now it's time to link up your posts! All you have to do is...

1. Follow Host: The Life Of Faith 
2. Link up your post!
Post can include anything related to mommy-hood, children, homemaking, pregnancy etc. If you aren't a mom yet, feel free to link up your preparation for motherhood, your journey as you try to conceive, or even a post that would be encouraging to the other moms in the party!

3. Add the Mommy Moments button to your post or blog so everyone knows where you are linking up!

4. Explore some of the other posts in the link-up and say hello to some new blog friends! 

5. Tweet or Share the link up on Facebook so we can all make even more friends!


The Life Of Faith
<div align="center"><a href="http://the-life-of-faith.blogspot.com//search/label/baby" title="The Life Of Faith"><img src="http://i1114.photobucket.com/albums/k537/faithkonrath/mommymomentsbutton.jpg" alt="The Life Of Faith" style="border:none;" /></a></div>

P.S. We will be having a new guest host every week! Want to be a guest host of the Mommy Moments Blog Hop? Send Faith a message at farmprincess14{at}gmail{dot}com. We would love to have you!

I'm a Baby Hoarder


When Madison was an infant, I was accused of "hoarding" my child. I was told that I was possessive and that I was going to spoil her, especially since I was breastfeeding. She would supposedly want no one but me and her father.

I stand strong to tell you that I was a baby hoarder.
Hi. I'm Megan, and I'm a baby hoarder.

I stayed home with my child as much as possible. I didn't really want people holding her during her naps, and we didn't go out too much. I "hoarded" my child. As a working mom, it was just my natural instinct to want to be home with her and soak up all that I could of her newborn snuggles.

Today, I hoard my family. On many Mondays we will have a nice, fresh, clean week ahead, but by Tuesday, maybe Wednesday, our entire week/weekend has been booked. That is, unless we hoard our baby. Unless we hoard family time.

With labor day weekend coming up, we have family coming to town, and we are super excited about the activities we have planned. We can't wait to see our sister, brother, and sweet niece (with her new glasses to boot!). After making those arrangements, though, it is so easy to slip into the cycle of "yes." Yes, we will do that. Yes, we will go there. Yes, we have free time.

Just because we have free time doesn't mean we have to book it up, even if, especially if, we feel obligated. Don't get me wrong, it is super important to spend time with extended family - they are precious to us. They do come second to immediate family, though {GASP!}. I am a strong believer that if we have adequate time at home just the three of us, we function much better as a family unit. We get along better, we eat better, we play better, etc. If our tank is not full of "home time" we do not go out and about with family/friends.

What about honoring your mother and father? There comes a point in time in life where honoring your mother and father mean doing what is best for your new family, your immediate family, your household as we call it in the insurance world.
{note: this is not a passive aggressive jab at any of my family members - just some thoughts!}

I read in a marriage book recently {Sheet Music} that many couples are taking the challenge to not be away from the house more than two nights a week. Many couples told stories of the sacrifices they had to make, but they also shared how close their family unit was. We have church on Wednesday nights, and usually a weekend outing. Other than that we protect our family time. Extended families don't mean any harm, but extended families can pull us away from a noble cause. "Good" events can, too. Such as church, ball practice, ballet, music lessons, etc. They are all a great cause and are so very purposeful in expanding your child's knowledge and skill, but at what cost? If it is causing more stress than joy, is it truly an adequate expense of your time?

Are you willing to sacrifice family time for things that aren't worth it?

Hello, I'm Megan, and I'm a baby hoarder through and through.
Oh, and my child is social and enjoys other people just as much as her mommy.


The Life Of Faith

Phone Treats




Random treats on my phone that make my day.

Sometimes I open my phone to find some of the darnedest photos. My hubby and my little girl surprised me with some darling photos on my phone. What a treat! Granted, they aren't the highest quality, and Madison isn't even smiling. In fact, she's crying because she wanted the phone all the while her daddy is trying to make her smile. But it's absolutely adorable. A perfect treat to my stress filled day.

I love how my husband makes my daughter's face light up.
I love how hard he tries to make her happy.
{Please note, he is wearing her Minnie Mouse hat}

He is a good daddy, my heart is full. 


Tantrums? Never!


I mean, I have tantrums sometimes.
I get mad, say things I don't mean, and do things I regret.
Shoot, sometimes I throw stuff.
Or wanna hit stuff.

It's a natural reaction to our emotion.

How do we address this with our children?

My child is what I like to call passionate.
She knows what she wants, and she knows when she wants it.

If she doesn't get it, she is mad.

Hopefully, this will mean that in her adult life she will chase after her dreams and let no one stop her or get in the way. Hopefully she will stand behind a cause and be passionate about it. Hopefully this will translate to her being strong willed {yet kind} and determined.

Today, I didn't do something she wanted me to do
{like give her my phone, or let her smash the computer, or carry around our car keys}
and she got so mad at me, she wadded up her shirt and clamped down on that sucker with her teeth. She just bit into it like a mad woman.

Now, I can relate to those emotions and those feelings but I cannot accept that behavior. I am opposed to spanking her, or popping her on her hand for tantrums and rages like the aforementioned because she will just lash out even more.

What I have been doing though is just removing her from the situation and removing my attention from her. I let her work through her tantrum and try not to laugh because, seriously, it's hilarious sometimes. A time out, if you will.

I don't know what else to do. Suggestions?
Do you have a "passionate" child?

Mommy Moments Linky Party!

Hey mamas!
Welcome back for another great week of Mommy Moments Link Ups! Thank you for linking up and for spreading the word last week! We love all of the great posts!

 This week's most viewed link belongs to Amy from Not Your Average Amy!  I agree with her post [project fifty two] sleepthat there is nothing cuter than a sleeping baby!


Now it's time to link up your posts! All you have to do is...

1. Follow Host: The Life Of Faith 
2. Link up your post!
Post can include anything related to mommy-hood, children, homemaking, pregnancy etc. If you aren't a mom yet, feel free to link up your preparation for motherhood, your journey as you try to conceive, or even a post that would be encouraging to the other moms in the party!

3. Add the Mommy Moments button to your post or blog so everyone knows where you are linking up!

4. Explore some of the other posts in the link-up and say hello to some new blog friends! 

5. Tweet or Share the link up on Facebook so we can all make even more friends!


The Life Of Faith
<div align="center"><a href="http://the-life-of-faith.blogspot.com//search/label/baby" title="The Life Of Faith"><img src="http://i1114.photobucket.com/albums/k537/faithkonrath/mommymomentsbutton.jpg" alt="The Life Of Faith" style="border:none;" /></a></div>

P.S. We will be having a new guest host every week! Want to be a guest host of the Mommy Moments Blog Hop? Send Faith a message at farmprincess14{at}gmail{dot}com. We would love to have you!

Online Shops/Paid Sponsorships


I. Am. Discouraged.

I recently started up an online shop, and I was super excited the first two weeks, but this third week has been a doosy! {My shop is called Bishop Place Handmade}

I have been in the blog world for a few years now. Meeting new people, supporting handmade, and buying from online shops. I have been an advocate for online shops, sharing, pinning, and loving on some of my favorite handmade shops {for free might I add} simply because I loved the products and the people behind the products. Now that I have a shop, why is it that everyone needs you to pay for a little support. Shouldn't we share pages that we love? Shouldn't we advocate for handmade?

We are all in this game together. It should be fun and light, instead it's all about how many followers and readers you have. It's really hard to start from scratch, but I'm not giving up. I'm not going to stop supporting handmade. It's a worthy cause.

So, what do we do when we are discouraged? We think positive thoughts. We overcome. We keep on and keep calm as the overly used slogan goes.

I'm keeping my head up. I'm pushing on. This desire has been place in my heart, I have worked hard to learn my skill, and I will not give up. I will not.

Feel sorry for me?? Go head over to Bishop Place Handmade and follow along. It will make me smile :)

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